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A Tale Of Two Teen Queens

Britney Spears vs. Lindsay Lohan - it all comes down to Mom and Dad

Last week Lindsay Lohan was formally charged with felony theft over a necklace she allegedly stole from a Venice jeweler. While it’s only the most recent story published with regard to Lohan’s alleged criminal exploits, it also demonstrates how very important parents’ roles are in their children’s lives.

Although I don’t know her personally, I feel so utterly disappointed in Lohan. I loved her in Tina Fey’s Mean Girls. She had blossomed from a cute little girl into a beautiful redhead not unlike a young Ann-Margret. At the height of her young career, she projected a much healthier body image than her starved waif-like counterparts.

And then it all went south. She got rid of her red hair in favor of a bleachy blonde and joined other young actors on the sickeningly skinny diet.

So why would a young celebrity who had it all – a budding career, fame, fortune – continue down the road of destruction?

Aside from the common refrain of “just another young star losing a battle to substance abuse,” I think there’s something much more meaningful to Lohan’s deconstruction: She has no one at home to take care of her.

It’s hard not to recall that frightening image of a bald Britney Spears taking an umbrella to a paparazzo’s van. Photos of that incident went viral, forcing everyone to see that the star – once not yet a girl not yet a woman – was a person who needed help.

When she was hospitalized after police discovered her under the influence of an illicit substance, her ex-husband, Kevin Federline, received sole physical and legal custody of their kids. In January 2008, she was committed to the psychiatric ward of Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center and subsequently placed under the temporary conservatorship of her father, James Spears, and attorney Andrew Wallet.

From all appearances, it seemed Spears’ dad took full responsibility of helping his daughter get well. She was shielded from paparazzi and other seemingly harmful influences, such as former manager Sam Lufti, ex-boyfriend and paparazzo Adnan Ghalib and attorney Jon Eardley, three men against whom Spears and her father obtained a restraining order for allegedly colluding to take over Spears’ affairs.

In addition to recovering from the downward spiral, Spears’ career bounced back with a bestselling album, Circus, critically acclaimed guest spots on How I Met Your Mother and Glee, and what looks like a full head of hair.

And for her part, Spears seems grateful to score a second chance with the public.

Lohan, on the other hand, seems hell-bent to prove she’s capable of so much worse just when you think she can’t help but get any better. As cliché as it sounds, it looks like her problems stem from her parents.

Unlike Lohan’s parents, who, if they aren’t at each other’s throats, are constantly seeking the next break in show biz, regardless of the toll it takes on their children, Spears’ parents mobilized to protect their daughter from becoming another sad celebrity statistic.

Her mother, Dina Lohan, now famous for continuing to exploit her children when they need her most, chooses to find excuses for her daughter’s behavior. These days it seems she’s trying to find excuses for herself.

Following Lohan’s recent hearing in which her probation was revoked, Dina told online blog PopEater that it was “all good” and that “God has a big plan” for her daughter, who was released on $40,000 bail.

Dear old dad isn’t doing much better.

Lohan’s father, Michael, recently dumped the blame for his daughter’s troubles at the feet of her managers in an interview with RadarOnline.com. He called them one-hit wonders who likely won’t have the same kind of success with Lohan as they did with Spears – yes, the same team who pitched in to help Britney are trying to do the same for Lohan.

Additionally, Dina and Michael also spend a significant amount of time ripping on each other. When an episode of Glee featured Katie Couric labeling Dina a loser, Michael told PopEater, “Dina deserves a lot worse of a title after all she has done to destroy the relationships with my kids and entire family.”

The two spend so much time making statements to the media that their kids, Lohan, Ali and Cody, seem almost accessories to a relentless barrage of self-promotion.

And that is the saddest thing of all. There’s a reason California uses the best interests of the child as a standard within family law – it’s because once you push Mom and Dad’s selfish issues aside, there’s still a child’s welfare at stake. For a family to succeed, even amid the breakup of the marital unit, the child’s best interests must be given first priority.

Sadly enough, Lohan’s best interests in this case may be to keep her parents’ at arm’s length. It may behoove the troubled starlet to try for a year with the divisively strict Tiger Mom. At this point it not only sounds like the setting for a great Disney film in which Lohan could star, but it may also provide Lohan the kind of grounding she needs for any hope of a comeback.

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Craig Maxwell May 19, 2013 at 05:10 pm
That's the gist of it, both of you. Obama differs from his predecessors not in degree but inRead More kind--qualitatively, not quantitatively. He is our first, true-blue presidential ideologue.
Status Quo May 19, 2013 at 11:15 am
That is correct 'Bat', pathetic attempts by followers of the present charlatan President - keepRead More trying to make, this some sordidly type of "racist" issue... wholly non-existent. In other words, affixing blame in search of a problem, for perceived political gain. The fact is, our President Barack Obama is a bad manager, hiring lousy managers in positions demanding excellence, affording no quarter for ineptitude and deceit! Promotion of figures and public servants as reward for ineptitude, should be punished by laws in-place and not shuffled around to administer more egregious miss-management. Lying to Americans has been perpetrated, by whom is in need of the reveal. The facts are inconsistent with, what has been revealed thus far. On the Muslim issue of the President's proclivity for apologies, it is appeasement at the least and inherent bowing to outrageous power at worst. The optics(hate that word in politics), are not good for America.
Batman May 19, 2013 at 10:36 am
Face it folks, you elected the wrong guy, twice. John Mc Cain is not that impressive, Mitt Romney isRead More a little better, but both of them are leaps and bounds above Mr Obama. At least they are both Americans. Questions have been raised about Obama's place of birth. Where he was born is not the issue. The issue is he is not one of us.
Debra Gilly May 21, 2013 at 08:51 am
Outrageous!
Status Quo May 19, 2013 at 11:18 am
'Bat'... At great individual cost, to be passed on to the consumer.
Batman May 18, 2013 at 04:02 pm
Perhaps the IRS is now in the identity theft business.
Things I Learned May 18, 2013 at 02:56 pm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solar_storm_of_1859#Carrington_Super_Flare
Things I Learned May 18, 2013 at 02:55 pm
http://www.space.com/21205-powerful-solar-flare-earth-fallout.html?cmpid=514648
Things I Learned May 18, 2013 at 02:54 pm
"A huge explosion on the sun will deal Earth a glancing blow today (May 17) but should not poseRead More a threat to the planet, scientists say. The sun storm erupted late Tuesday (May 14) during a powerful solar flare — the fourth unleashed by a single sunspot in just 48 hours — and hurled a massive cloud of charged particles out into space at millions of miles an hour."
Status Quo May 19, 2013 at 10:34 am
Why yes 'TIL', I do remember a more vibrant. lively and robust Patch site in the region! Now theRead More Mommy Bloggers are happy, happy, happy*. Patch may or may not be getting what they want, but the tourist rag they are producing is fun for the Mommy Bloggers - they adapt so well. In the early few days of the "transition"... I had prepared comments on positives and negatives, as well suggestions to make San Diego region Patch workable... all for naught and logical lack of interest. Recently... voices of the Grape Nuts... on the left side have called oppositional views "unpatriotic"... though discordant, it isn't like people were allowed to die without expedient help or laws being abridged, abrogated or circumvented. Cry's of "slander" are incorrect, but doesn't prevent those more discordant voices from uttering the tones. I remember when Free Speech reigned in America 'TIL'... I do? Sure the chicks were nice... until they aren't. *ala Phil Robertson
Komfort May 17, 2013 at 03:01 pm
Komfort May 17, 2013 at 02:22 pm
I used to come here for the chicks.
Craig Maxwell May 15, 2013 at 10:35 am
Just imagine how much tax-payer money's been blown on Art's drinking junkets over the last quarterRead More century (and how many sidewalks have been soiled).
Linda McCreight May 16, 2013 at 09:06 am
Rides4Neighbors is a great service. Because I work and travel a lot I cannot always get my motherRead More to her appointments and the folks at Rides4Neighbors are always so helpful and my mom really praises the drivers for their help and friendliness.
JWatson April 20, 2013 at 10:38 am
Mark, they were making that U-Turn to drop off their elementary school children in the red zoneRead More anyway....so the no U-Turn sign kills two birds with one stone: no bad U-Turns + no parking in the red zone. And, we are talking about elementary school children, so safety should have been all those parents first priority.
Mark Gregory Elliott April 18, 2013 at 03:12 pm
It is good to narrow the streets. Pedestrians are road kill in San Diego County. And if drivers doRead More not realize there is not enough room to make a U-turn, they need to retake the driving test instead of going over the curb. This is not rocket science people.
Komfort April 21, 2013 at 12:38 pm
Did S(he) tell you what was "shoddy" about his helping women with their choice?
Stuart Strenger April 20, 2013 at 02:48 pm
I've talked to God, and (S)he definitely supports a woman's right to choose whether she remainsRead More pregnant or not but disapproves of the shoddy way Dr. Gosnell ran his clinic. Surely you see the distinction as well. Medical malpractice is malpractice from any religious or ethical position. By the way, God also said (S)he supports gay marriage.
Komfort April 20, 2013 at 10:51 am
What does your God say about Kermit Gosnell and a woman's right to choose?