But names will never hurt me!

So ends the English nursery rhyme that encourages children to ignore name calling and not retaliate. Recently, headlines around the world reported about the American grandmother taunted by schoolchildren. Many saw the video and watched as she endured taunting, bullying, and physical attack. Over the ensuing weeks, many new stories led with, “Why do children bully?” No one asked, “What’s the best way she might have diffused the situation?”

As many seniors shift from full-time driver status, public transportation is often the recommended alternative. In research, many older adults’ perception of safety is a major concern when using public transit. What can that perception or possible fear mean to a senior? Dr. Pilar  Placone, PhD, LMFT, Author of “Mindful Parent Happy Child” says “Fear, can be a teacher. It can keep you safe.” “Use it to learn and take action.” Dr. Robin Bonifas, PhD, MSW, Asst. Prof School of Social Work, Arizona State University, an expert in elder bullying adds, ”Bullies torment people they can overpower. So sending verbal and non-verbal messages that one isn’t intimidated are effective strategies.”

Using that expertise provides seniors a unique opportunity to take a personal inventory on their self-esteem and confidence. Those two valuable qualities may enhance their experience on public transit. The knowledge gained can also be used as they navigate our health care system or maintain their independence.

Remember PAPI (pronounced like Pappy)

1. Preparation- When traveling, know where you're going!
enhance your self-esteem.  Bullies prey on those who appear to be weak or vulnerable. Knowledge is a confidence builder  enhance your self-esteem.

2. Awareness – Know where you go. Observe where you park, notice your surroundings and those around you. Maintain a mindful attitude and expect to have a safe trip.

3.Purpose- Walk with attitude. Make eye contact and keep moving. You've prepared for your trip and you KNOW where you're going. You will reach your destination confidently.

4. Instincts- If your voice tells you not to get on a bus or trolley, DON'T! If it tells you not to get off at a transit stop, DON'T! Wait for the next bus or trolley.

PAPI is an easily remembered acronym seniors can adopt when embarking on a trip, meeting a new medical professional, or managing their business affairs. See my upcoming article diffusing senior bullying. Use your age as an empowerment tool. The knowledge and wisdom you have acquired during your life have been your teachers. Now is the time to use that education to maintain your independence.